Online Across NY & CA
Online Across NY & CA
Individual Therapy for Relationship Issues
in New York City, NY and San Diego, CA
Online Sessions Across NY, NJ, and CA
Are you feeling stuck in your relationship?
Your relationship isn’t going the way you thought it would. You imagined you would always feel connected, heard, and understood by your partner but for some time it hasn’t been that way.
Instead, it’s an ongoing up and down, one week feeling that things are good and the other worried that they aren’t. When things aren’t going well, you’re continually stuck not knowing what to do and why this keeps happening.
You find yourself...
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Walking on eggshells trying to avoid the argument that you know you’ve been through countless times
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Living in an environment filled with tension, frustration, and awkward politeness
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Trying to talk about why things have felt off but the conversations rarely make a dent
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Trying to express your anger, resentment, and sadness but feeling like it only makes things worse and leaves you feeling disappointed and unheard
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Experiencing a flurry of thoughts and feelings pulling you in so many directions, finding yourself more confused than ever
You’re frustrated your partner still doesn’t understand how you are feeling and what you need.
You say to yourself:
“How did we get here?”
“Do they even care.”
“What can I do to make things better?”
“Is it me, them, or the relationship?”
“I don’t want to give up but I don’t know what else to do.”
You're tired of questioning yourself - your thoughts, feelings, and behaviors -
and it's starting to impact other parts of life too.
It’s hard to sleep, focus, feel confident in yourself, and connect with other people. The state of your relationship takes up almost all of your thoughts. You say to yourself, “Why am I bad at relationships?” and “What is it about me?” that things can be so hard. This leaves you feeling bad about yourself and even more anxious. Your body feels heavy, tense, and jittery with worry at times. Other times you just feel numb and defeated.
You have a harder time focusing at work, feeling more burnt out than usual. It becomes harder making time for friends because of the sadness you feel. There’s also some hiding from friends because you feel embarrassed and not confident in yourself, knowing that the relationship isn’t feeling successful. Your family checks in and you don’t want to tell them how hard it’s been either in hopes of keeping their good relationship with your partner and keeping them from worrying about you. Maybe you’ve tried distracting yourself and focusing on other things in the past but it’s no longer working.
You guess or know that your partner doesn’t want to do couples therapy but you know you need help in navigating these relationship challenges.
You Don't Have to go Through It Alone
Imagine if your relationship felt less overwhelming and confusing and instead felt more predictable and clear.
You could finally better understand why the relationship has so many ups and downs and why arguments keep happening.
Imagine if you felt more confident when things started escalating in the relationship.
You could know what to do and say, staying in control of your emotions, words, and boundaries.
Imagine if you felt less scared of your feelings and instead more connected to them.
You could know where your big reactions and emotions come from, how to self soothe, and what you really want and need.
Imagine if you felt less tense and more calm in your body and home.
You could finally breathe easier and sleep better.
Imagine if you felt less stuck and more secure in yourself and your relationships.
You could feel like yourself again and reconnect with the ones you love.
My Approach
Therapy with me will give you a safe space to make changes individually that will impact your relationship and your life in a positive way.
You will have the space to figure out how you feel, what you need, and what your boundaries are without having to worry about your partner’s reaction. You’ll be able to get angry and sad without having to hold back your thoughts or feeling being afraid it will make things worse.
You won’t have to do it all alone anymore.
Identify and Understand
Together we will begin to identify and understand the negative patterns in your relationship and how you get stuck in them. We will explore your role in conflict including your triggers and where they came from. We will do this in a validating and non-judgemental way because I know you are doing your best and doing this work is hard.
Tune In
We will work together to help you tune into yourself and get clear on what you really feel, think, and what your body is telling you. If you’re scared to start this process, know that it’s normal that some defenses come up here and that we will go at your pace.
Cope
Our coping mechanisms are strong and usually created at an earlier time that worked for us and that context. However, as we become adults and live in a different context, a new coping mechanism is usually needed. We will figure out the right strategies for you so you can manage tough feelings, thoughts, and overwhelm.
Communicate Effectively
Communication can become difficult when our emotions are running high. Even if you think you know what you want to say, it can be hard to put it into the right words. We will work together to help you find the right words to be clear and create more understanding and connection with those you are working to communicate better with.
Build Your Support Network
While your relationship that brought you into therapy is the main focus, we will also look at the other support networks in your life and how to connect or reconnect with friends and family that you may have turned further from during this stressful time.
Individual Therapy for Relationship Issues can help you...
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Understand the stuck patterns your relationships gets in
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Identify what your role in conflict is and what you can do differently
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Realize why you get triggered and where it comes from
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Figure out what you really want and need
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Confidently set boundaries and communicate effectively
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Better manage stress and anxiety and find calm within
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Reconnect with the ones you love
Are You Going Through a Break Up?
Sometimes relationship don't go the way you'd hoped and you find yourself either considering the ending or having already come to the end of a relationship. I understand that the ending of a relationship brings about unique challenges.
I'm here to support you.
Therapy After a Break Up
Unlock a Happier and Healthier You
FAQs
Can individual therapy help a marriage or relationship?
Yes - in individual therapy, we will focus on what is in your control to change. By working on your part of the negative pattern of interacting, we can make changes to help you create a more positive way of interacting with your partner.
How is individual therapy different from couples therapy?
Individual therapy is a private space for you to understand and explore your feelings and thoughts. It’s a great way to find clarity in yourself and have the opportunity to learn the best way to bring it to your partner.
Do I need couples or individual therapy?
Many times one partner is not ready to begin couples therapy or you are in need of a space to figure out what you want first. We will continue to assess at what point couples therapy would be more effective.
Do I need to be in a relationship to be in individual therapy?
No - individual therapy is a great place to explore past relationships and what you are looking for in a future relationship. It’s also a great place to explore non-romantic relationships such as parents, siblings, and friends. Understanding yourself better will help any relationship you choose to have, thrive. You are welcome regardless of your relationship status.
I’m going through a break up. Can therapy for relationship challenges still help me?
Yes - we will work through the loss and greiving process together. Understanding how the relationship came to an end can be helpful in understanding your individual patterns and getting clear about what you want in a future relationship.